The Bahamas! For Christmas! My parents are certifiably insane. When you are raised in New England, how can you possibly think that a cruise in 100-degree heat is festive for the holidays?

Alas, they said that after raising four kids, three of who were not going to make it in for the holiday, they deserved a new and different treat for themselves this year. "Just forget about me, " I told them. "Don't worry that now I'll have to find something to do for the holidays."

Of course, this just launched my mother into another one of her 'you are 32-years-old, don't you think it's time you settled down?' tyrants.

Back when my mother was young, everyone was married, with children, by the time they were twenty-five. It was almost as if I was a disgrace for her, to have crossed the barrier into my thirties and still be single. It wasn't that I was unattractive, nor had I lacked boyfriends (I was even engaged?once.) over the years. However, my mother could not seem to grasp the fact that things had changed since she was young and it was not every woman's life-long dream to be barefoot and pregnant by the time she was twenty. Nor do women nowadays, with the divorce and infidelity rate such that it is, want to rush into a settled life with a partner who is only going to wreck her life at some point, leaving her alone and defeated.

My Pessimistic Attitude. This is the one point that my mother and I agree on. Of course, I prefer to think of it as My Practical Attitude.

My basic problem, if I were to narrow it to one thing, is that I want Prince Charming with a lifetime guarantee. I refuse to settle, thereby making the alternative to be alone.

And these were my thoughts during my drive to my holiday destination. I had come close to finding my prince, of sorts, once before. Or so I thought. I just had to keep looking?

It had been the big day. The wedding. My best friend was finally starting her life with the man of her dreams. She gave hope to the rest of us. Of course, some of the rest of us might also simply be looking for a little meaningless sex, but hey ? you never know what could happen.

He was Best Man to my position as Maid of Honor. I lived out of state, as did he, so we had never met until the day of the wedding, in the back of the church, a mere ten minutes before the start of the ceremony. His plane had been delayed the day before due to inclement weather, so he had missed the Friday evening rehearsal and dinner. The next day, it was he, not the groom, who was reciting "get me to the church on time".

I had snuck to the side of the church, where Mike, the groom, and his groomsmen where patiently waiting. Mike was calm, cool,